I’m at Annual Training for the National Guard, and it’s been a bit of a struggle. I’m not coping well with my latest bout of depression, and it’s been hard to be functional and not a drag on my section.
I’m incredibly lucky in that my NCOIC is not only a good NCO, but a good friend, and he’s helping me develop coping mechanisms to get through the next 10-ish days. Having something to focus on that I am, quite frankly, good at helps. I may not be able to control all the brain weasels, but I can still frame a shot, and with help, put together a video.
I’m eating well, at least, because my beloved husband took the time to shop for me and I have the means to cook. That helps. I’m exercising too, which is good, although good BOB it’s hot out there. (Note to self: Pls to drink more water today. That headache is probably from a lack of sleep but the lack of water isn’t helping.)
Anyway, I didn’t start out this blog post with the idea of updating my latest go ’round with the brain weasels, even though they’re kind of inevitable in my life.
No, I’ve had the germ for this post in my head for a while and I finally saw something on Facebook that made me think it was time to write it down.
It was silly- “Tweets From Couple That Prove They’re Winning at Marriage!”or something very similar.
Accompanying the click-bait headline were, indeed, a bunch of tweets. Most of them supposedly highlighted the “inevitable” conflict of marriage. The “humorous inequality,” or the “henpecked hubby” were also pretty common and frankly, I don’t get this at all.
John and I, well, we talk. If one of us is feeling blue or like we’re not being listened to, the other one pays attention and we work together to fix the communication. There aren’t towels he can use in “my house,” and he isn’t henpecked because I talk over him and don’t value what he says. I don’t second-guess his shopping or whether or not he uses coupons. There is no wrong way to put milk back in the fridge, and if there is something that would irritate me SO much if it were “done wrong,” I do it myself.
We do finish each others’ sentences, or sometimes we don’t finish conversations but we still know exactly what we said and discussed. (Evidently we “do that married thing” a fair bit.)
But seriously, he’s my best friend. He’s the one person I want to see more than anyone else at the end of the day. He’s my favorite in the history of EVER. Why would I want to tweet things that are…mean?
I know, some folks find it funny. They find it funny to take stealth pictures of their SO doing something…whatever, and then post it. Or they find it funny to show the world how “bad” their marriage is, and I don’t get it.
What I do get, and I’m so dang grateful that I can’t even begin to express it, is a husband who respects my boundaries. We’ve talked about the fact that I don’t like having my picture taken, especially if I’m asleep or doing something goofy, and posted, and he respects me enough to not do that. Oh, I’d get over it, but he’s kind enough to not put me in the position of having to get over it, and that’s worth so much to me.
It’s kind, it’s considerate, and it’s a concrete example of the esteem he holds me in.
If you and your spouse are okay with teasing each other in public, or making those kind of posts, go for it. I personally just don’t understand it.